A Rose Among Thorns

Do you ever feel like you fit in so well, but yet, not at all? By now I've lived in a few different cities; from the mountains to the prairies, from Canada to Australia, from my hometown to it's rival city, from the familiar to the unfamiliar. It's so different every time. I love the adventure and excitement of new places, but starting over in each place has it's challenges too. There always seems to be one vital piece of the pie missing. As much as I try to fill that void, it remains vacant... until I move to a new city and it is filled, while a different piece then lies empty. Perhaps I have an unrealistic idea of reality, but being aware of that is better than pretending everything is perfect.

You've probably heard the phrase "bloom where you are planted." As relevant as that is, if the sun doesn't shine where you are planted, you're not going to grow. Sometimes you have to be transplanted to reach your full potential. I'm no botanist, but maybe you are blooming in some areas, but are wilting in others, perhaps as you grow those areas will reach sun too. I was never very good at analogies... so, moving on...

Although I feel many things have simply fallen into place this year, there are other aspects of my life that really seem to be lacking. God doesn't necessarily allow us to have "perfect" lives, if that were the case, there would be much less room to broaden our horizons as we'd just sit in our comfort zone. So here I am, learning that the easy way will likely leave you stagnant in the long run. Challenge yourself. Get out there and do something that scares you. Take a leap of faith. Have courage. Love life as you go.

Sleep. Study. Eat. Repeat.

Over the past couple weeks my life has changed fairly drastically. I moved to Kelowna, and coming from their rival city, obviously I got razzed about that quite a bit. On departure day, I left home in the early afternoon, but after filling up my car with petrol, my poor little Etsy decided she didn't wanna start back up again. Yup. It could have been worse. Luckily for me, I have two of the most loving, caring parents out there, who graciously came to my rescue, let me borrow their car for the week and got my car towed to the mechanic. You could say it was eventful day! 

I began school, studying to become a Certified Dental Assistant. Learning to be a student again has been a much easier transition than I imagined. On my first day we got to do a scavenger hunt, considering me and the other two girls in my group were super competitive, we won! We got prizes and everything, I am now the proud owner of a chic, black, tic tock clock that graces the presence of my bathroom. I know, I'm pretty lucky ;) We also won a bunch of stuff that'll come in handy in the clinic, like gloves and masks! On that first day, I learned how to use a combination lock... TO MY VERY OWN LOCKER!!! You're probably thinking "what's so exciting about a locker..." well, my friend, if you had never had a locker before you would probably be pretty stoked too!Y'know how in the movies when they're hanging out in the hallway, and they slide down their lockers and just sit and hang out? Yeah. I get to do that now. 

During the rest of the week they crammed as much info into us as possible. It felt like my brain was going to explode. We only had two classes the first couple days, so we'd have 3.5 hours of each class. 7:30am - 4pm. By the time the weekend rolled around, I just wanted to sleep. But, ironically, as we were learning all about infection prevention and disease control, I got sick. Just a cold, but after learning all about various bacteria and what those little buggers are doing to you, I felt like a walking cloud of contamination. I was comforted to know others in my class had similar experiences over the weekend. 

In other news, my new place is in the most prime location. I live a 15 minute walk to school, but only 2 minutes from the beach! You can even rent water tricycles, kayaks and paddle boards! How epic. Hoping to try those out at some point. 

Ha, someone asked me the other day if I've met any boys since I moved here. Well, being in a class of 24 girls, you could tell me there were no boys in Kelowna and I would probably believe you. 

Anyways, hope you've had a beautiful Sunday! 

Take care <3

-Silks

  

Thinking About You

When I was fourteen I to travelled to Europe with my family for the ultimate summer vacation. During that time I fell in love with the excitement of it all: the architecture, the variations in food, the culture, the unknown... but most intensely - the people. I met many of my aunts, uncles and cousins in Holland for the first time. Every gothic cathedral, local cafe, and theme park was far more enjoyable because of the people we shared those experiences with. My dad's cousin also offered to be our tour guide on a trip to Paris, and, if you've seen my bedroom, you'd know this was a dream come true. The moment the Eiffel Tower came into view, I just melted. Once I returned home every single one of the 20+ mini replicas in photo, painting, keychain, clothing, and figurine form that graced my room were now little reminders that triggered memories I will treasure forever. But the thing I missed more than anything were the beautiful people who became such close friends during those 5 weeks abroad.

Well, here we are, three months after leaving Australia and the feels are about the same as my 14 year old self. Every conversation, every song, every moment back in Canada triggers a memory from those 7 months I spent overseas. I left a piece of my heart there, and now I'm left to mourn the loss of the adventure that has been. A plethora of amazing things happened in my life during the course of the past year, many of which include meeting some the most genuine, kind and caring people who became some of my favourite people in the world. I mentioned once before "The great is the enemy of the the good", though at the time I'm not so sure I understood the depth of that quote. Now, my life is good, I'm moving to a new city in three days, starting school (Uni) and celebrating my 23rd birthday in four days, the excitement of the unknown is at my fingertips, but some of the greatest days of my life so far happened while I was in Australia.


People are going to start thinking I'm crazy when I randomly burst out laughing or a tear rolls down my cheek outta no where. Well, if you had experienced what I experienced, and you felt what I felt, you would know that Mama Ng makes the best curry in the world, I have the biggest couple crush on Chris and Jess, my abs are the cause of laughing till it hurts with Mae, spontaneity, adventure and exhilarating are synonymous for hangouts with Pip, playing Catan with JinJin never gets old, watching Step Up with Nat is the best way to spend a night in, Tom makes a fantastic florist, Steve throws top notch house parties.

In short... I'm Thinking About You. 

Ottawa: Kandace and Nic Tie the Knot!

After getting a necessary full nights sleep, I had the privilege of attending the NET Canada Thanksgiving Mass and Banquet! To be honest, I purposely booked my flight so that I would make it in time for this event. When talking with Kandace's future sister-in-law, Julia (who works on NET Staff) the night before, she kept mentioning various people I know and love so dearly, people I totally didn't realize I'd get to see the next day!

Also, there are perks and downsides to having lost luggage. The downsides are pretty obvious, but the perks! Getting to raid everyone elses closets!! =D Kandace brought me heaps of clothes from her place, but I also borrowed a couple articles of clothing from friends we were staying with #girlshousehold! So I was loving that, especially since I'd been wearing the same few dresses, singlets, shorts and everything else for the past 8 months, new clothes was incredibly delightful! Thankfully, after three days my bag was found and returned - Praise God! 

Ottawa was my first home away from home. Although I never actually lived there, I spent much time there my first year out of high school while I was on NET. I loved revisiting my favorite places downtown and discovering new ones! Kandace decided to surprise me by going to an Ottawa Outlaws pro ultimate game! I was extra excited cause my buddy Mike, who I played with for a bit back home, is now on the team! It was a beautiful hot day too, had a blast hanging with Kandi and Nic.

I spent the week in Barry's Bay hanging with the two love birds, helping with wedding prep and just basking in their presence! Was great quality time before everyone else showed up! 

Before we knew it the wedding was upon us, it had been gloomy and rainy for days, but on the day of the wedding it had cleared up and the sun was poking through the big fluffy clouds. What a surreal moment when Kandace walked down the isle, she was glowing. The pure, holy and sincere love between the two of them and God was so evident, they will do great things! I felt especially privileged to be apart of the bridal party and spend the entire day with them!
When it came time for pictures, we didn't have a venue in mind, so as we were driving along in our caravan of vehicles, we pulled into the driveway of some random house, Nic hopped out and asked the home owner if we could take photos in their yard (that's the ultimate complement on your landscaping, I'd say!). Great idea, we got epic pictures and had a blast while we were at it!
Dinner and speeches were both delightful, but the dance was even better. Half way through the first dance, a couple of the groomsmen whipped out a chair, jug of water, bowl and towel. As the music was building, Kandace sat down and Nic washed her feet - the ultimate sign of service, as Jesus washed his disciples feet at the Last Supper. The beauty of it all brought immense emotion to many, it was so touching. Gah! I love them more and more all the time! #couplecrushing

Beautiful wedding, beautiful couple. I am so incredibly blessed to have this portrait of sacrifice, service and love to look up to. Can't wait for their future together! Plus I get to brag to everyone that Nic Carvalho is my brother-in-law! Ha!

O Canada!

To get from Queenstown, New Zealand to Ottawa, Ontario I flew on 5 planes, went through customs and security 4 times, watched 8.5 episodes of Suits, I laughed, I cried, got excited and sad - I was in transit for 51 hours. It gave me a real perspective on how big the world really is, even though I was flying at a speed I couldn't really comprehend.

Our first layover was in Sydney. Flying in I could see Cronulla - the beach I'd always go to, and the Shire - the suburb where I'd lived. When we touched down, the flight attendant announced "Welcome to Sydney!" Jennine and I glanced at each other with a look only we'd understand. We weren't staying. What a tease! Knowing that we were within an hour radius of so many people we loved, but couldn't see any of them, was just the worst. Felt like we had to say goodbye to Australia all over again. 

When I arrived in Dallas, Texas, I discovered my luggage was missing. We had been told we would have to manually transfer our bags and re-check them since we were changing airlines. Jennine had found her bag no problem, but I waited until no more bags were coming out onto the carousel, then decided it must have gotten lost. I wasn't afraid of when they would find it, per say, just IF they would find it. I would hate to lose all the sentimentals and souvenirs I had collected over the past 8 months, so I was praying hard to Saint Anthony to find it!

Once we hit Vancouver I had a bunch of messages regarding my bag, but all I could think about was food... mostly Timmy's! Felt good to be somewhere so familiar: the YVR, where the majority of my epic adventures begin... and end. We arrived pretty late, saw three Tim Horton's but they were all closed. How sad! Though I was so confident that there was one open late cause I have pulled a couple over-nighters at the YVR and definitely been greeted by Tim's upon my return, so I was determined. Lo' and behold, Jennine was overjoyed by surprise and delight when she saw me waltz up, Iced Capp's in hand. I was pretty overwhelmed, with the stress of trying to locate my bag, I wasn't sure if I was crying tears of sadness or joy! Probably both.After 4 hours of interrupted sleep, 6am rolled around pretty quick and it was time for more flights! This time just domestic flights, which are far less complicated. I flew out 3 hours before JinJin, but she got up and waved me off at Security. What an incredible adventure we had together. We literally saw each other everyday, from the day we left Vancouver to the day we returned. We were good friends before, but now we share memories and stories that have brought us much closer. I am so blessed by her. Thankfully, I'll be stopping by her city in a few weeks, so the goodbye didn't seem so final.

My flight from Vancouver to Edmonton was my only flight that was on time! But once I got there I discovered the 2 hour delay on my flight to Ottawa. *sigh* As if my journey wasn't long enough! Haha, I was pretty spent at that point. With the change of my arrival time, my sister Kandace wasn't able to meet me at the airport due to another commitment too, bummer. When things like this come along, comfort food is definitely a real thing - in my mind, this is any food that makes me happy, and in this case it was WOK BOX! YUMMMM! I've missed my Mama Ng's cooking, so some Asian food was quite satisfying.

Once I was on my last plane, I fell asleep before we even took off, I was exhausted! I was woken up shortly after by a gift from my parents! They surprised me with a Thai Chicken Wrap! They happened to be flying to the East Coast that day, so when they bought in-flight meals for themselves, they also bought me one! They're the best.
In other news, I had decided to catch up on my journal by the time I got to Ottawa. butttt... the only pen I had... died. So that wasn't gunna happen. But! (Jennine will be shocked by this) I read nearly 50 pages of my book instead! This is only impressive cause I'd been reading the same book the entire time I was in Australia, I was far more committed to keeping up with my journal, and completing crossword puzzles. Clearly, I'm not much of a bookworm. 

Twinsies!

I was so relieved to finally arrive in Ottawa. It was SO HOT and HUMID! 27C!Summer, round 3! I was not dressed for the weather. My future brother-in-law, Nic, graciously picked my up from the airport, and delivered me to the event Kandace was playing Cajon at. A couple people there had to do a double take when they saw me cause they thought I was Kandace - rightly so, we were both wearing jeans and a black t-shirt with our hair swept up in a top-knot. Obviously this was not planned, just coincidental. It brought me back to our teenage years having everyone ask: "are you guys twins?". I embrace it now more than I did then. What a privilege it is to spend time with her now that our lives have lead us to different places in the world.

During those first few days back in Canada I caught myself thinking, "you're driving on the wrong side of the road", "which is the passing lane..?", "WOW! 97.9 cents!? Petrol is so cheap here!!", "THERE'S TIMMY'S!!", "DQ!!!!!", "Mmmm... Peroggies!!!!", "Bagels. Yuuuuummmmm!", "Toonies and Loonies! They won't look at me like I'm an idiot anymore!".

I've been thoroughly enjoying the simple pleasures of being back in Canada, though I'm not technically home yet, there are some things that are nationally the same... and some that are not...

Like bagged milk. Weird. 

Jet Lagged

I sit here, writing this as I fly across the Pacific ocean. Back to the familiar: my friends, my family, my home, my reality. I spent the past 225 days overseas, primarily in Australia, but also a couple weeks in New Zealand. It was my dream. As a 7 year old child watching the Olympics in Sydney, something about Australia caught my attention. About a year later, 'Survivor: the Australian Outback' aired on TV. Not only did this start my Survivor obsession, it fed my desire to one day visit Australia. As I grew up, that desire grew and grew into the dream of all dreams. When I was 14 I went on a family trip to Europe, the excitement and constant adventure brought me so much joy, and that's really where my extreme love for traveling began. Mix it all together, you have the recipe for the #1 item on my bucket list: explore and live in Australia. 

I had met a few Aussies within the past few years at home, and they just added to the intrigue, not only did the place sound epic, I knew the people WERE epic! Maegan Williams was my first Australian friend, I originally met her through mutual friends at a party in 2013 but a few months later she was staying at my house as a missionary on NET. We hit it off. She gave me a hair wrap and I hoped it'd never fall out! Throughout the year  we sent each other letters, and once she returned to Australia, emails. In the spring (March) 2015, I decided if I didn't get into school (College) I'd go to Australia. When I told my Mom this, she cried. "You're gunna go there and find a boy, get married and never return!" I laughed about that. Since all my mail from the school was going to my parents house, my mom found out the result of my application before I did. I got wait listed. She didn't tell me for a few days.  When i finally found out, I was SO EXCITED! Maegan was the next to know - I was finally going to fulfil a dream that started when I was a little kid. I had never been more sure about a  such a decision before.

I invited a couple friends to join me on my radical adventure: Sarah and Jennine decided to grace me with their presence. 

Jennine and I arrived in Sydney on October 18th, 2015 (we met up worth Sarah in Brissy later). We spent our first week staying at Maegan's house - we instantly fell in love with the South Sydney community, and from then on I'd planned on living there for a few months after all our gallivanting was done. And it was so. I scored the BEST possible host family to stay with, getting my fix of delicious Asian cuisine, as well as some rock hard abs from all the silent laughing. I made some of the best friends a girl could ask for, going adventuring every weekend and having solid D&M's - conversations you can only have in a 'safe place'.

Dehydration 4 Lyf, you made me feel so welcomed from the moment we returned to Sydney, the nachos and Oatley Pub experience was one to remember :)

After all was said and done, and it came time for JinJin and I to say our goodbyes, you - the people I care so deeply about - threw us the best,  most shocking, heartfelt, EPIC surprise farewell party possible. I felt so loved. Even if you had to disappoint me in the process, cancelling all previously spoken about goodbye parties, I forgive you - this party definitely made up for it ;) Kudos to all of you for keeping the secret!

Today I'm flying back to Canada, had a layover in Sydney enroute. As we flew in I could spot Cronulla, the Shire, and had a good sense where Mortdale was - they announced 'Welcome to Sydney!', but my heart sank... knowing I was so close to all my Aussie friends, but so far. What a tease. As we departed, I felt like I had to say goodbye all over again - for real this time... back to the northern hemisphere, the true north strong and free, the land of Timmy's and PEROGIES!

This trip was literally a dream come true, I imagined it would be amazing, but I couldn't have anticipated it being anywhere as good as it was. I will keep all the memories close to my heart, for they will be a smile on my face that is incomprehensible to everyone else. 

I love you all, and miss you more than you know! 

Camellia Gardens

The day before our epic adventures in the wilderness, I had an interview with a job agency in the City. The basis of the job would be traffic stopping people in department stores trying to promote/sell fragrances. It was the farthest I had got so far with job applications, so I pursued it, although from the start I was pretty leery about it. After a group interview of 14 people, I was convinced I was the lease qualified person there and didn't expect to be called back for a second interview. Well, lo and behold they asked me to come back and offered me the job! I decided they just wanted me 'cause I'm foreign and have an accent since 5/6 of us were from abroad. After learning about everything that was required of me for this position, I didn't even have the honeymoon of being excited. Plus, there were meticulous grooming standards, none of which I approved of.

After my first day, I went home and ranted about how awful it all was and that I'd finish the 3 shifts they had given me for the week, but after that, I was DONE. And I was serious. Tom (my host dad) found the whole thing hilarious, thinking I was just being terribly dramatic. But it was that bad. After day two, I got a call from the agency asking me to cover 3 more days the following week, I was trying to find excuses to decline, but I had a weak moment and gave in.

I had mentioned to Pete I was in need of some solid fun times after my first few days of pure torture, so that weekend he arranged to go for brunch at the Camellia Gardens Teahouse in Caringbah. Everyone was interested to hear about my new job, so I gave them the DL... but they were not very compassionate. I told them I had to cake my face with make up wearing bright red lip stick and smokey eye make up, slick my hair back into a pony tail and wrap the elastic with hair to hide it, and wear 2 inch heels. They were like "So basically you're a model and you're complaining about it." Raaaaaaage! Ahhhh! Nobody understood. My mom had called me to video chat after a shift one day and she didn't even recognize me... that's how different I looked.

Sarah, Mae, Pete and I at the Camellia Gardens.

Anyways, the Camellia Gardens were gorgeous. After we had a bite to eat we went for a stroll through the park. There were geckos crawling across the foot path, ducks and geese in the streams, and jovial cries of laughter from deep within our chests. Johno, Sarah, Maegan Pete and myself decided to continue the party in Cronulla at the Simon's apartment unit. We talked about all the things we could do, but ended up just hanging out and talking for most of the arvo. Eventually we ventured out to the beach and rock hopped along the ocean. It was the perfect remedy for a rough past couple days. We eventually decided on a cuisine for dinner, and got noodle bowls from Thai Face. I tried 'Pad See Ew' for the first time, no regret! Was delish. Sarah had gone to Mass, but joined up with us again after dinner as we headed back to the unit. We played a quick game of Smegal and headed home before too late. It was exactly what I needed: good friends and fun times :)

Rock hopping in Cronulla.